I like roller coasters, but this is ridiculous.

[chrystalline]

Wednesday, May 12: I called home, because my mom's best friend (who also happens to be the mother of my exBF and a good friend of mine) was visiting and I was hoping for a chance to talk. Unfortunately, we didn't get to talk long. Two-hour time difference and work the next day made the conversation short and rushed, but my mom and I agreed we'd talk more (and get everybody on the phone) on Saturday, since the friend was leaving on Monday.

Saturday I went to the local DMV to try to convert my license. The website says they'll accept birth certificate, passport, US identification card, US military ID, and a bunch of other forms of identification for driver's license conversion. Last I knew, a state driver's license counted as US identification. When I got there, the woman at the desk said birth certificate or passport only. Since I seem to have misplaced my convenient card-sized birth certificate, this meant no DL conversion this month. Annoying; two hours and two bucks wasted on getting there and back. The weather was nice, but the weather is almost always nice here. Is getting rather boring. So, I tried to call home while I was waiting for the bus to get home; busy signal. First thought was that they were talking to my brother, so I called him. No answer. Remembered they have call waiting, so busy signal means dad must be online. Tried to call friend in SC, no answer. Noticed just before my bus arrived that the guy in the car was trying to get my attention; I was wearing jeans and tee-shirt, no makeup, and sunglasses, and he still thought I was worth trying to pick up? Gave him a puzzled look and headed for the bus, which was pulling up a few cars behind him. Don't much like this "Hey, baby, hop in" attitude I keep encountering. Around dinnertime I gave up trying to get through to my parents' number and called a friend in NJ. Had fun chatting and doing mindless web quizzes and personality tests over the phone;)


The Fun Part:

Piratey Quiz
Your pirate name is: Iron Charity Flint

A pirate's life isn't easy; it takes a tough person. That's okay with you, though, since you are that person. Like the rock flint, you're hard and sharp. But, also like flint, you're easily chipped, and sparky. Arr!



Medieval Quiz
Many years ago there was a period of time that is often casually called "Medieval." It was a time, so the story tellers tell us, of tiny kingdoms, brave knights and ferocious dragons.

Transportation and travel were both crude and difficult, usually necessitating that each kingdom be as self sufficient and self reliant as possible. So it was very important that within each kingdom all the major crafts and professions of the day were ably represented to insure the survival of the kingdom. In the English language we still see remnants of some occupations in the familiar surnames such as Smith (as in the village smithy), Carpenter, Miller, and Baker to name just a few.

Interestingly enough, beyond the specific title the vocation also took on its own greater personality. This personality preference can also give a broader understanding of the basic complementary style and types necessary to the kingdom's survival, or perhaps any organization's success. Although the specific vocation influenced the name, it was no accident that certain personality types and styles gravitated to certain occupations. The personality of these jobs suited the inclinations of the job holders, and the predecessor to modern day job descriptions was born. The successful matching of a job-holder's personality to the personality and unique requirements of the job was necessary to the kingdom's survival, or perhaps any organization's success. The successful kingdoms more than likely were able to blend the differences into a powerful and formidable entity. With today's diverse workforce, the corporate kingdom that acknowledges and nurtures these personality preferences could become an organization as successful as the Camelot of old.

Even though we now appear to have the freedom to explore many different career alternatives, we still have a medieval vocational personality within each of us. This personality, properly identified and understood, can motivate our success but, if ignored, may set the stage for our ultimate failure. Since times appeared to be simpler then, let us return to the kingdoms of medieval Europe and see what we would have done then, regardless of what our names are now.

Your distinct personality, The Discoverer, might be found in most of the thriving kingdoms of the time. Your overriding goal is to go where no one else has ever gone before. Regardless of the number of available natural problems to be solved, it is not unusual for you to continually challenge yourself with new situations or obstacles that you have created. You are an insatiable explorer of people, places, things and ideas. You thrive on constant change and anything new or different. On the positive side, you can be creatively rational as well as open minded and just. On the negative side, you might be an impractical and indecisive procrastinator. Interestingly, your preference is just as applicable in today's corporate kingdoms.



http://scifi.about.com/library/weekly/aa080201.htm?PM=ss14_scifi
Star Trek Personality Test -- Results
Myers-Briggs would say that you are an ENFP (Extrovert, Intuitive, Feeler, Perceiver). In Star Trek language, you share a basic personality configuration with James Kirk and Julian Bashir.

People like you are generally great problem-solvers. You're highly innovative, creative and unique. You're optimistic by nature, which may make others believe you're naive, but actually you're full of energy, very clever, and determined not to be stopped. You're outgoing, curious, and extremely playful. Others are sometimes taken aback by your enthusiasm, but it keeps you going after others have dropped.

You're deeply caring, sensitive and gentle, which, combined with your need to solve problems, may make you a little too eager to give others advice. You also process information very quickly, which may make others believe you're not listening to them. Before you share your feelings, you have to have time to process them.

You're adaptive and resourceful, but sometimes highly disorganized. You dream of having the perfect assistant. You respond best to people who encourage your unique viewpoints and insights, help you maintain harmony, and want to play and explore with you. You don't respond well when you're overwhelmed with details or when you're in a rigid situation.

Your primary goal in life is freedom to see possibilities, make connections, and be with a variety of people. Your reward is having spontaneous adventures.

Good careers for your type include being an advertising account executive, starship captain, career counselor, developer of educational software, actor, graphics designer, corporate team trainer, psychologist, inventor, medical pioneer, and child welfare counselor.



On Sunday I got some cleaning done, made pizza, ate too much of it while watching Galaxy Quest. On Monday, I felt down most of the day for no apparent reason. Mostly I guess it was frustration with the whole job-not-as-promised thing. I got home and had a check in the mail from my own checking account; my attempt to pay my credit card online hadn't worked right. Caller ID box was flashing; two calls from home. Pleased, yet disappointed to have missed a chance to talk more with our friend before she left, I returned the call. Mom's sister died, and the funeral was to be Thursday, so they were flying to MI on Tuesday. My reaction: "Huh?" Totally unexpected, very hard to absorb; she was only 51, maybe 52. She was found in her apartment Monday, but no one is sure when exactly she died. She lived alone. We weren't all that close, but it hit me hard anyway. It took me a while to figure out that the reason it hurt so much this time is the fact that, for the first time in my life, I've been alone when a member of the family has died. The rest of the family could gather at the funeral, my brother had his friends in school, but I'm by myself in a new place where I'm having trouble finding friends, and if I were to die on a weekend, I would also not be missed until Monday. I cried myself to sleep.

Tuesday I was depressed most of the day, but I had things that had to get done, like laundry, and I don't have anyone here to take up the slack when I'm out of sorts. Heaven forbid I get sick; there's nobody here to help. I got my laundry done, but I left it folded in the basket; didn't feel like putting it away. Had a voicemail from a place I'd found at ActorFest; they were interested in interviewing me for a teaching position with their academy. I also found a fascinating job posting on EntertainmentCareers.net and applied via email.

Wednesday was the boss' daughter's birthday, so everything was cheerful and festive, a distinct contrast to my personal mood. There were "alligators" (like cinnamon rolls, only flat, with pecans on top) in the morning, Chinese food catered for lunch (and yes, they actually had one of the dishes I could eat, so I did manage not to get sick) and a chocolate-strawberry cake in the afternoon. UPS tried to deliver a package to my apartment before the office opened, so I had a barely-audible voicemail from the delivery guy. That irritated me; I suppose it shouldn't, but I was kind of stressed. I also called the academy place and made an appointment to interview with them on Saturday. I called a couple of friends to talk, and went grocery shopping while talking with one of them. Cell phones are wonderful; since I can't have my friends with me in person, I get them on the phone and we can pretend we're going shopping together. I'm pathetic... My cat had major issues that night; I'd given her a new variety of canned food, and she seemed to like it, but I certainly didn't like the smell that resulted the next time she used the litterbox. I switched her back to the canned food she'd been getting, and she's been whining at me every day since, wanting the other variety back. I still have several cans of it, but I don't think I'll buy more; I really didn't like the result, and the whining is getting on my nerves.

Thursday was busy; I liked having actual paperwork to do. I hate sitting there doing nothing, or tearing paper into little pieces. I'm told they went through two $1000 paper shredders because people kept putting too much paper in it, or not getting staples out, but it seems to me that the technology has improved enough that they might take a chance on a $200 shredder that claims it can shred staples and paperclips just fine. I did quite a bit of running around, too, as FedEx apparently doesn't want to pick up packages at our building anymore; they put a notice on our pickup box that we should now drop our packages off at another box down the street. I got to sprint for it, since the girl who had tried to take the packages down has a badly sprained ankle, and didn't know where the other box was. After work, I caught the bus to BestBuy, because I couldn't find the power cable I needed online. Amazon.com didn't have it, BestBuy.com didn't have it, so I decided to go have a look in person. Zillions of cables for laptops, but they assume you'll never need a replacement power cable for your desktop. They didn't have any in stock there, either, but they found a price in the computer and sold me a cable off one of the demo computers for half price. This made me very happy with BestBuy; I like a place where employees take the initiative to "take care of the customer" even when it requires a little creative thinking to solve the problem. It's good for them, too, because not only does it make me more willing to go there to get what I need, but I'm also telling all of you how happy I am about them. Good all around.

Had a bit of a problem, since the bus I rode to get there stopped running early, but the driver who let me off gave me advice on which buses to take to get back, so I did get back. It just took a little longer.

On Friday the cat was still whining about the food choice, but she does eat what she's given (though she won't eat dry food anymore, so I'm glad I didn't buy a big bag;) She just makes sure I know that's not what she wants. Didn't have as much paperwork to do, and people were in and out quite a bit. Made some basic mistakes on things that usually I'm very good about, and one of the officers commented on it. I mentioned that it had been a stressful week, and when she asked why, it was all I could do not to cry right there. I had thought I had things under control, but that one question brought it all back to the surface, and the rest of the afternoon I was miserable and could hardly wait to go home. Picked up my packages at the apartment office finally (a wicker shelf-basket-thing my mom ordered for me and a replacement for something else that had gotten lost) and a nice guy who saw me struggling along helped by carrying the lighter boxes that were otherwise likely to fall off and break. Opened them up to find the framework for the wicker thing required glue (which was provided in the kit) and decided not to bother with it yet, as I was tired and depressed and my hands were shaking with exhaustion and lack of food. I forget what I had for real food, probably chicken, but I also made a "Cheer Me Up" cake (Devil's Food cake mix, 1/2 cup oatmeal, drizzle caramel over the batter in the pan, stir slightly if caramel will not sink into batter, then bake according to directions; frost and sprinkle with colorful dots) in spite of my resolution to be good and go on a diet. I was still unhappy, though; lonely, depressed, in physical and emotional pain, and I ended up curled up in a ball on the floor complaining to God about why I had to be born a girl. It's always seemed to me that I would be happier if I had been born a boy, and in fact, my parents had expected to have a boy. They hadn't even picked out a girl's name, so I surprised them when I was born. People who saw me when I was a baby thought I *was* a boy, and muttered dark things about my mother for dressing me in pink. I can't stand "women's magazines" because they seem so inane. I don't like romance novels or "modern fiction" and I hate being pushed to get married. There was a time when I thought that marriage was the only way to solve my emotional problems, but I was wrong. Finding friendship did me a world of good, and now I'm not sure I ever want to get married. I know I don't want kids; messy, smelly, whining, require-attention-24-hours-a-day...no. I don't fit in the world of women, and I hate it. So I pick up my Bible and find myself at Jeremiah 18:

"Cannot I do with you as this potter? saith the LORD. Behold, as the clay is in the potter's hand, so are ye in mine hand,"

I get the point. I still don't understand, but I get the point. Amy Carmichael wanted blue eyes, but she needed brown to get away with rescuing girls from the temples. God knew she needed brown eyes. Obviously He made me a girl for a reason, but I don't know what that reason is, and I'm getting frustrated with the up-and-down stuff. It was a wonderful miracle that I got a job and an apartment in a place like this as fast as I did, but I'm not meant to stay a receptionist forever, and I don't know what step I'm supposed to take next. I know it's not always easy, but I don't like not knowing what step I'm supposed to take next. I guess I'm just impatient.

Stayed up late working on my resume for the academy place and getting it printed out. I had needed the power cable for the monitor on the other computer because this one doesn't have a functional printer. Then I looked up bus routes to the academy. According to Mapquest.com, this place is a 40 minute drive from me. By bus, it's three and a half hours. I started looking at taxis.

Saturday morning the academy lady called to cancel/postpone the interview; something had come up, and she was going to have to reschedule. Don't know whether to be disappointed or relieved, as I was not looking forward to the trip, but was looking forward to the possibility of getting a job at least related to what I studied. Called home and argued for a while regarding my intense need for motorized transportation. (side note: my grandmother called and discussed my post of Apr. 25, which I also sent by email to all my family and friends. Her words: "That girl should be published." Heh. But who would buy my diary?) If I can't have a car, I want a motorcycle, preferably one with a little bit of storage space on the back so I can pick up a few things at the grocery store or WalMart or someplace. My friends seem to find the idea of me on a motorcycle somewhat amusing and yet totally believable. I think it would be fun. They don't take up as much space as a car, so parking would be a little less tricky. They use less fuel, so gas would be less expense. Insurance is probably sky high, but being female and over 25 should help. We will have to see; I still need to figure out how to find a motorcycle that suits my needs, convert my DL, get the insurance, and learn how to ride it;)


Got my FWD number set up and connected to a UK phone number, so if any of my friends in the UK want to call and talk to me in person for a change, let me know and I'll email you the number. If nobody calls me in three months, they'll deactivate the number and I'll have to reregister. Just remember I'm 8 hours behind you, okay? Please don't wake me in the middle of the night...

This is cool, too: http://pulver.com/reports/pulver-decision.pdf

FWD works with MSN Messenger, or you can download a free program, or you can buy a phone for about $70. Unlike Skype, you don't have to have WinXP. The best part is that there is no fee, and you can talk to people anywhere in the world. Also, you can call toll-free regular phone numbers in US, UK, Netherlands, Japan, and I think they're working on getting France set up. You can be in any country in the world, and you can call a US 800 number. Very handy, especially if you're doing business with a US company and need to be able to talk to them by phone. I think FWD may eventually replace the standard phones, but it'll take a while. It does require high speed internet connection. Any of my friends who get FWD, let me know, and I'll email you my FWD number.

Look for other Network Members displaying this icon to show the world they are part of the FreeWorld!


In other news, anybody know where this came from? I watched all the special features and then TT:EE all the way through trying to find it, and have had no success. I've forgotten which YahooGroup I downloaded it from, but I am really trying to find the source of this clip. Anybody know? There is video, too, yes?