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Long again, and I don't feel like cutting.
May. 8th, 2004 11:10 pmWell, it's been an interesting few days, at least. Wednesday the temp agency called to talk to the other girl, and my first thought was, 'Oh, no, they're getting rid of another one?' I was wrong, though; they were calling to see if she wanted to stay. I found out a little later: the boss came to tell me they're giving her the job they'd promised me because "She's learning it faster." Well, yeah. She doesn't have to answer the phone and open/distribute mail and do the banking and do a regular message run in between trying to learn all this, besides the fact that she's ACTUALLY BACK THERE WHERE THEY'RE WORKING! I'm locked out in the lobby where no one can see me; of course the isolated elements they give me to do don't make any kind of cohesive sense to me. On top of that, they like me as receptionist too much. They don't want to let me promote to the position they promised me because I'm TOO GOOD AT WHAT I'M ALREADY DOING. Okay, I'm shouting a lot, but this really irks me. I was excited about this position because they had promised me everything I asked for. If they're not going to give me what I need, maybe becoming a permanent employee there was a bit premature. Found out Thursday that they actually *told* her that the post they were offering her was the one they'd offered me. She said she asked them if they were sure they'd given me a chance, and they pretty much brushed her question off: "Yeah, yeah." This has discouraged both her and me, and since we seem to have common interests, we've started discussing things a little more. Apparently, though, the boss is paranoid about that, so nobody ever talks about their outside-of-work-socializing where she can hear. Another notch in the "Is this office really as great as it initially seemed?" chink. If the crack in the wall gets much larger, both she (the temp) and I are likely to get loose; neither of us is particularly happy about being used as substitutes for a $200 paper shredder.
This other girl is actually older than I am, but she's another single who came to LA with the stated goal of becoming a producer, and she agrees with me on a lot of the oddities of LA (Lay off the horns, people! Really!) so it really feels more like hanging around with someone my own age. She's not all *that* much older than I am, anyway. I've told her about some of the links I've found for film-job-hunting, and she mentioned something about applying with an extras casting company. This caught my interest in a big way. I was thinking last weekend about myself and what I really want to do, and I came to the conclusion that the only thing I'm *really* good at doing is performance. I can sing and I can act, and I've been doing so for free since kindergarten. On Thursday, when she mentioned trying to be an extra, it occurred to me that she might be interested in pursuing that angle a little more, and since I don't have a car, perhaps we could go together to: ActorFest. She took a little convincing, but I offered to split the cost or pay for parking, so she decided to go. It was fascinating (to me) and I went to almost every booth on the exhibition floor (skipped the "Kids" stuff;) She was less thrilled, and expressed surprise that I was that interested in it. Now, chances are, if you're reading this, you know me well enough to know that I don't do things by halves. No, I didn't sign up for any of the lessons/seminars/workshops/etc, but I collected information in a way that showed her, at least, that I'm serious about this. I knew what I was looking for, and if the exhibitors were pushing something that didn't interest me, I'd take their papers and go, or I'd skip it. If the booth interested me, I'd ask questions and look for details. Seems very sensible and practical to me, but I guess she hadn't realized that when I say I'm interested in doing something, I mean to pursue it. There were photographers roaming the crowd, just like any convention/trade show, but I did notice at least once that a photographer was trying to catch her and me as we were looking at one of the booths. I don't know if she noticed, but I knew he had a better chance of getting the shot he wanted if I pretended I didn't see him. So, there's at least one picture at ActorFest with me in it; wonder what the chances are that it'll end up any place where people can see it. The booths that interested me weren't the booths that interested her, and she got bored before we were 3/4 of the way through. She went out to wait in the lobby while I finished browsing and collecting info, and when we headed back out to the car she mentioned her surprise that I was so "into" this. Apparently she's not exactly sure what she wants to do. She likes acting, but she's not sure she likes it enough to try to compete with all the others out here who want it with all their might. She likes writing, but she's not sure if that's what she wants to do, either. She likes 3D animation, too, which I think is cool because I also like animation; I'm just not very good at it. I got to show off my kitty and my computer when we got back to my apartment; my two favorites!
Anyway, I have cool swag to sort! There's a pencil with a brain on it in my swag bag...weeeeeird...Oh! Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Still not keen on the brain-shaped pencil topper, sorry. AFTRA-SAG Credit Union...keychain? I think that's what that is. Issue of BackStage West; that's cool, it's not exactly cheap. A waterbottle, a highlighter, a BackStageWest pen, a...blank index card? Maybe that was supposed to go with the pencil? Dental floss? Who packed these bags? Before I started sticking stuff in it, I mean. A car air freshener with a clapboard on it proclaiming, "I'm an actor!" Mm-hmm. Lots of ads, but it's a trade show, so ads were what I was after. I actually got a lot of interesting information regarding what is considered "normal" just by talking with the exhibitors, too. They use terms and refer to things that I haven't dealt with before, but it was very helpful to pick up in casual conversation (rather than bumbling into someone later who thinks I'm an idiot for not thinking/saying/doing something like that) I wish I could've stayed longer, but she wanted to leave. I have *got* to get a car. Oh, one thing that really got me; a handful of people seemed to think they were being really clever to comment on my shirt; I wore my Scotland tee that I bought at Busch Gardens Williamsburg last summer. Note to all: it is not cute to call someone "Scotland" just because it's on her shirt. IMO, it makes you look like an idiot. Also, even in LA, wearing a shirt that says "Scotland" does not mean one is a recent immigrant from there. I am new to LA, but I've been in the US my entire life, okay? Gah. Maybe I'd've gotten a little more respect if I'd worn my SIGGRAPH polo. Also got a little old being asked, "Are you an actress?" Well, we're at a trade show for actors and we're looking at your booth, what do you think?! Pff. Obviously they need work on their spiels. Mentioned to one guy that I'm trying to get a copy of the USSRC promotional/educational video that I'm told "features [me] prominently" and he muttered something about how I ought to be getting paid for it. I know better; one of the forms I had to sign when I worked there was a release allowing them to use my image for promotionals, but while I have no legal claim to demand money (beyond what they paid me to stand up and talk every day), I think I should be able to get a copy or two of the video. Would be *very* good for a demo reel.
One lady did find it interesting/amusing that I'd leave rocket science for film;)
On the way back, saw a poster/billboard for The Day After Tomorrow: from the director of Independence Day. Am beginning to think he just likes knocking over the Statue of Liberty.
Checked back in at my fave 3D messageboard after all this time, only to find that they went bugnuts while I was busy in RL. Too much screamin' an' yellin' goin' on in there; not sayin' nuthin' there 'til things settle down a bit more. Still want the Millennium Horse and Unicorn, tho. And a whole bunch of other stuff that I'd link if I could figure out how to link the wishlist so other people can see it. Stupid website; they let me check "Allow people to search for your wishlist by email address or username" but it doesn't tell me how to search for anybody else's, so I don't know how to tell anybody how to search for mine! Erg.
Used my gift card from the apartment complex to buy The Last Unicorn from Blockbuster. It's another of those "I liked it when I was a kid and huh, I never noticed how thin the plot was," movies like The Neverending Story. I'm sure the books had much more plot, but watching these movies now makes me think because I've studied film and know now what a good film *should* be. I think it's interesting to evaluate and compare;)
Oh! Forgot to mention Blow To The Ego #2 on Wednesday: apparently I am not permitted to joke around with my co-workers. I was told Wednesday that I should knock off the smart remarks (which are my way of playing around with friends). The others make smart alecky comments all the time, but I guess I'm not allowed. I was not given any example of what was offensive, and I have no idea what I said wrong. I'm just not supposed to make any smart remarks, which, of course translates to me as, "No, we don't really want you to relax and be friends; you're still an outsider and we don't really want you." Yes, I do resent it, and I spent most of Friday dreaming of getting an acting job and leaving these spiteful people in the lurch. I need to finish sorting my collection of ActorFest ads so I can figure out what I need to do to make that happen.
This other girl is actually older than I am, but she's another single who came to LA with the stated goal of becoming a producer, and she agrees with me on a lot of the oddities of LA (Lay off the horns, people! Really!) so it really feels more like hanging around with someone my own age. She's not all *that* much older than I am, anyway. I've told her about some of the links I've found for film-job-hunting, and she mentioned something about applying with an extras casting company. This caught my interest in a big way. I was thinking last weekend about myself and what I really want to do, and I came to the conclusion that the only thing I'm *really* good at doing is performance. I can sing and I can act, and I've been doing so for free since kindergarten. On Thursday, when she mentioned trying to be an extra, it occurred to me that she might be interested in pursuing that angle a little more, and since I don't have a car, perhaps we could go together to: ActorFest. She took a little convincing, but I offered to split the cost or pay for parking, so she decided to go. It was fascinating (to me) and I went to almost every booth on the exhibition floor (skipped the "Kids" stuff;) She was less thrilled, and expressed surprise that I was that interested in it. Now, chances are, if you're reading this, you know me well enough to know that I don't do things by halves. No, I didn't sign up for any of the lessons/seminars/workshops/etc, but I collected information in a way that showed her, at least, that I'm serious about this. I knew what I was looking for, and if the exhibitors were pushing something that didn't interest me, I'd take their papers and go, or I'd skip it. If the booth interested me, I'd ask questions and look for details. Seems very sensible and practical to me, but I guess she hadn't realized that when I say I'm interested in doing something, I mean to pursue it. There were photographers roaming the crowd, just like any convention/trade show, but I did notice at least once that a photographer was trying to catch her and me as we were looking at one of the booths. I don't know if she noticed, but I knew he had a better chance of getting the shot he wanted if I pretended I didn't see him. So, there's at least one picture at ActorFest with me in it; wonder what the chances are that it'll end up any place where people can see it. The booths that interested me weren't the booths that interested her, and she got bored before we were 3/4 of the way through. She went out to wait in the lobby while I finished browsing and collecting info, and when we headed back out to the car she mentioned her surprise that I was so "into" this. Apparently she's not exactly sure what she wants to do. She likes acting, but she's not sure she likes it enough to try to compete with all the others out here who want it with all their might. She likes writing, but she's not sure if that's what she wants to do, either. She likes 3D animation, too, which I think is cool because I also like animation; I'm just not very good at it. I got to show off my kitty and my computer when we got back to my apartment; my two favorites!
Anyway, I have cool swag to sort! There's a pencil with a brain on it in my swag bag...weeeeeird...Oh! Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Still not keen on the brain-shaped pencil topper, sorry. AFTRA-SAG Credit Union...keychain? I think that's what that is. Issue of BackStage West; that's cool, it's not exactly cheap. A waterbottle, a highlighter, a BackStageWest pen, a...blank index card? Maybe that was supposed to go with the pencil? Dental floss? Who packed these bags? Before I started sticking stuff in it, I mean. A car air freshener with a clapboard on it proclaiming, "I'm an actor!" Mm-hmm. Lots of ads, but it's a trade show, so ads were what I was after. I actually got a lot of interesting information regarding what is considered "normal" just by talking with the exhibitors, too. They use terms and refer to things that I haven't dealt with before, but it was very helpful to pick up in casual conversation (rather than bumbling into someone later who thinks I'm an idiot for not thinking/saying/doing something like that) I wish I could've stayed longer, but she wanted to leave. I have *got* to get a car. Oh, one thing that really got me; a handful of people seemed to think they were being really clever to comment on my shirt; I wore my Scotland tee that I bought at Busch Gardens Williamsburg last summer. Note to all: it is not cute to call someone "Scotland" just because it's on her shirt. IMO, it makes you look like an idiot. Also, even in LA, wearing a shirt that says "Scotland" does not mean one is a recent immigrant from there. I am new to LA, but I've been in the US my entire life, okay? Gah. Maybe I'd've gotten a little more respect if I'd worn my SIGGRAPH polo. Also got a little old being asked, "Are you an actress?" Well, we're at a trade show for actors and we're looking at your booth, what do you think?! Pff. Obviously they need work on their spiels. Mentioned to one guy that I'm trying to get a copy of the USSRC promotional/educational video that I'm told "features [me] prominently" and he muttered something about how I ought to be getting paid for it. I know better; one of the forms I had to sign when I worked there was a release allowing them to use my image for promotionals, but while I have no legal claim to demand money (beyond what they paid me to stand up and talk every day), I think I should be able to get a copy or two of the video. Would be *very* good for a demo reel.
One lady did find it interesting/amusing that I'd leave rocket science for film;)
On the way back, saw a poster/billboard for The Day After Tomorrow: from the director of Independence Day. Am beginning to think he just likes knocking over the Statue of Liberty.
Checked back in at my fave 3D messageboard after all this time, only to find that they went bugnuts while I was busy in RL. Too much screamin' an' yellin' goin' on in there; not sayin' nuthin' there 'til things settle down a bit more. Still want the Millennium Horse and Unicorn, tho. And a whole bunch of other stuff that I'd link if I could figure out how to link the wishlist so other people can see it. Stupid website; they let me check "Allow people to search for your wishlist by email address or username" but it doesn't tell me how to search for anybody else's, so I don't know how to tell anybody how to search for mine! Erg.
Used my gift card from the apartment complex to buy The Last Unicorn from Blockbuster. It's another of those "I liked it when I was a kid and huh, I never noticed how thin the plot was," movies like The Neverending Story. I'm sure the books had much more plot, but watching these movies now makes me think because I've studied film and know now what a good film *should* be. I think it's interesting to evaluate and compare;)
Oh! Forgot to mention Blow To The Ego #2 on Wednesday: apparently I am not permitted to joke around with my co-workers. I was told Wednesday that I should knock off the smart remarks (which are my way of playing around with friends). The others make smart alecky comments all the time, but I guess I'm not allowed. I was not given any example of what was offensive, and I have no idea what I said wrong. I'm just not supposed to make any smart remarks, which, of course translates to me as, "No, we don't really want you to relax and be friends; you're still an outsider and we don't really want you." Yes, I do resent it, and I spent most of Friday dreaming of getting an acting job and leaving these spiteful people in the lurch. I need to finish sorting my collection of ActorFest ads so I can figure out what I need to do to make that happen.
